She makes me want to use Crystal Meth

It would be worth the rehab just to have Kristin Chenoweth, Interventionist, sing to me at my intervention.

See more Kristin Chenoweth videos at Funny or Die

A Sad Day, A Happy Day, A Broadway Day

What's sad...

Today is the last day for The Color Purple on Broadway. Loyal readers will know I have had a hate/love relationship with this musical and I have no idea how it is now that Fantasia is gone but I am still sad to see it go.

What's happy...

Kristin Chenoweth is performing at the Oscars tonight!

I shouldn't be here...

You may remember how much I loved Fantasia in The Color Purple. I had gotten a ticket to see her one more time before she leaves the show on January 6th. Well, Fantasia didn't show for this performance so I stood in a LONG line for a refund. Evidently she has missed more than 50 performances during her run!

Broadway week wrap-up

I recently wrote about how much I loved The Color Purple but I saw two other shows.

Cyrano de Bergerac was great too. Jennifer Garner, Kevin Kline and the lead from Take Me Out starred. The sets were amazing. It was a very tall theatre and they didn't skimp on using the space. As wonderful as the show was, I was very cramped in my seat and ended up leaving at half time because my knee was kiling me.

Xanadu has been called the gayest show on Broadway and I don't know how you can get much gayer than that show. Drag queens, Olivia Newton-John songs, gay jokes, roller skates, the gay lead (Cheyanne Jackson) in short, short, short roller disco shorts, a humungous disco ball, gay, gay gay! I felt like I was one of the few first-timers there. It was a very fun time and luckily they are recording the Cast Recording next Monday. The lead is the original Penny Pingleton from Hairspray!

What a difference four stars can make

You may remember I walked out of the musical The Color Purple it was so bad. Well I saw it again! Fantasia is currently starring and believe it or not, star is the right word. Or stars to be exact. Four of them. This production left me amazed and extremely confused. Last time I saw it the emotional connections were missing (no one was afraid of Mister, Celie and Nettie didn't seem close, etc.) but this time ALL of the connections were there. I couldn't tell you the last time I cried at a Broadway show (Ok, it was probably Doubt) but I cried last night. Multiple times. And I was certainly not the only one. When poor Nettie and Celie were being separated by Mister I prayed they were both wearing kneepads.

Shug Avery just blew everything away. Even now I'm sitting here wishing I could have the version of "Push the Button" she sang last night. I listened to the preview of the song on iTunes from the original cast and it's nowhere near as good. Since when is the second cast of a musical better than the first?

I dreaded seeing poor Sophia after she was beat up for not wanting to be the mayor's wife's maid. I dreaded it because I was afraid it would be just as heartwrenching as in the movie. Well it was and more. Although they didn't actually show the scene where Sophia is surrounded by all the white men (there were no white people in this production) and beaten, it still was extremely powerful.

Oh Nettie. Nettie was eerie because she seemed to have been channeled right from the movie, looks, voice and all. But that was an amazing thing and it was an amazing performance.

And Fantasia. How can I forget Fantasia? I can honestly say I don't think I've ever clung to every word out of a performer's mouth like the last drops of air. I BELIEVED she was a little girl of 14 and dealing with the loss of her second child in the hands of her baby daddy (her real daddy). I BELIEVED she loved her some Shug Avery (even if she was partly a Nettie substitute). And I BELIEVED she was finally a self-actualized older woman. Maybe this is the only role that Fantasia can convincingly play in her whole life but oh my god every line was perfect. And her singing! I understood every word she sang and although she Fantasiaized it (like that word?) she made it convincing and part of her character.

Until she leaves the production in early January, it is my favorite show on Broadway. If you have any inkling to go to New York between now and then don't miss her.

Market price. Ha! Skippy's Broadway debut. Yay!

We landed at LaGuardia about 4 pm. Skippy didn't know it but I had gotten us tickets to see The 25th Annual Putnum County Spelling Bee because we both loved Barret Foa as the lead in Avenue Q.

So we needed dinner. I whipped out my GPS to find us something but the damn thing can't get a signal in NYC. All those tall buildings. We started walking and ended up at Shula's. I had only been once (at Lotusphere) and Skip had never been. I had only ever ordered a Lobster entree once and they had it (for market price) so I did. It was amazing.

The bill came and I was shocked. I figured, market price, ok. $40 maaaaybe $50 dollars. Try $125 for a four-pound lobster! I learned my lesson about Market Price!

So onto the theatre. When you walk in the whole place is decorated like a high school (it is a spelling bee after all). Skippy and I got interviewed as four audience members actually get picked to participate. Skippy got picked! He was soooo nervous before the show. I told him the only word he better not misspell was c-a-t. Other than that, he should just have fun.

The show starts, and in short order Skip and the other three are called on to stage. It's dressed like a gym and the kids sit on bleachers. Who leads Skip up to his seat and sits next to him? Barrett! A good 25 minutes of the show goes by before Skip has to spell his first word. Barrett talks to Skip (in character), eats a sandwich, etc. Finally it is Skip's turn. He misses the FIRST word! It was MEXICAN! He forgot the C. He was so nervous he couldn't even hear them telling him the word. He started laughing, the audience started laughing, he laughed more, they laughed more, you get the picture. When you misspell your word, a dreadlocked black guy (doing community service) serving as the grief counsellor gives you a hug and a juice box. Skippy was so funny he got three hugs! He came back to his seat and he gave me the first sip of his juice box. Mmmm, grapey!

After the show people were congratulating Skip and some thought he was actually a cast member. One little girl wanted his autograph. The picture is Skip with a lot of the cast.

Not bad for the first five hours of our vacation.

You go girl

I walked out of The Color Purple on Broadway at intermission because it was so bad but evidently I'm making another trip to NYC in the next 7 months because Fantasia is going to be Celie. So she can't act (did you SEE her Lifetime movie???). Who cares? I loves me some Fantasia. And I love her even more after she inadvertantly(?) gave Ryan Seacrest the finger while hugging him last night.

What was wrong with the musical? Well for starters, did anyone involved see the movie or read the book? No excuses there since Alice Walker, the author of the book, was involved with the production. Maybe I just was there on an off-night. Let's see... No one was afraid of Mister. Not even Celie. Mister wasn't even that mean to anyone. Mister's Daddy wasn't mean to anyone either. There was no connection between Celie and Nettie so I didn't feel much of anything when they were separated. Well that's enough to ruin it for me. No emotional connections = extremely bad musical.